Hope

Tonight I played electrician for my ex-wife. What a mess her electrical is, all sorts of unused boxes, unused wires, and the whole thing is set up for a generator, yeesh. What a mess. Anyway, got her squared away and got a nice meal out of the whole deal. Probably could have gotten more than that, but I excersised some judgement and decided that wouldn’t be the best thing to go and do. What with us not talking for the last 3-months. I don’t need the sex and that’s not the relationship I want to be in. And like I said the other day, I’m not what she’s looking for right now anyway. Besides, I think we both know who I want to be with. Right.

Hell, that’s why I started blogging again. So that at least maybe I’ll be read and not fade away. I know it’s a horribly passive-aggressive thing to do, but what are my options… I don’t think I have any. I’m just waving the flag as my ship slowly sinks beneath the waves.

Though, I will say, yesterday was an unexpected surprise. I’m both happy to know that at least my MySpace page is being looked at and shocked at how I found out. Quite brazen.

I’ve been listening to Kid Rocks newest CD for the last couple days and really enjoying it. I like the rockin’ stuff more than the ballads, but that’s probably just because I’m in a raw state with my feelings right now; a little angry, a little hurt, a little scared, and a little hopeful. I cover it all with some hard bass and screaming guitar. Works for me.

This morning I checked the bank and my tax refund arrived, sweet. Now I can pay last years taxes and still have enough money to move out. There’s a little rental house I’ve got my eye on in Waterford by my old high school. Assuming things go well when I talk to my boss next week, Tuesday, I think I’m going to make the move. I’ve been with my sister long enough. It’s time to move on. Besides, if I hold onto that money I’ll end up buying a new vehicle. Ah, who am I kidding…. that’s gonna happen soon anyway…